Drinks, Compliments of the Prime Minister
by HeroesLover77
Summary: Newkirk tells the group about something he did before he was a prisoner. And he's not proud of it. Okay, yes he is...
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer - I don't own the characters, or the show. (In a sense, I don't even own this story plot…)

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**Drinks, Compliments of the Prime Minister**

**CHAPTER ONE -**

"Newkirk, if I didn't know you better, I'd say you love alcohol even more than you love women." Hogan said, shaking his head. The group began passing around the cups, and LeBeau opened a bottle of vodka.

Newkirk and LeBeau had returned from a mission in Klink's office, and, as well as the papers they had been sent out to steal, they had relieved the Kommandant of some of his liquor.

"Well, sir, we would've come back with girls instead, but Klink didn't happen to have any in his liquor cabinet. And we all know how you feel about our messing around with Fraulein Hilda -"

"Okay, enough." Hogan said, grinning as he gave Newkirk a little shove. "But still. What you wouldn't do for a drink…"

"You don't know the half of it." Newkirk muttered, not really intending for anyone else to hear him. But they did.

"What does that mean?" Carter asked, as LeBeau poured him a drink.

"Do we want to know?" Kinch asked, grinning at the Colonel. Hogan smirked.

"It's nothing really. Just something me and my mates did at the start of the war. Pretty daft, now that I think about it. We could have been arrested!" Newkirk told them, the nostalgia gleaming in his eyes as he recollected the event.

"Well, come on! Fill us in!" Hogan insisted, taking a drink.

"Well…alright." Newkirk said reluctantly. "But don't judge me! It was a really dumb thing to do, know that I think about it." Despite his efforts at seeming regretful, Newkirk was obviously proud of whatever he had pulled off.

"I was on a ship, heading across the English Channel. My mates and I have just finished our training, and we were about to reach the mainland, at which point we'd be joining our fellow RAF guys in showing the Krauts a thing or two about flying."

The other smiled at this boastfulness. Newkirk was very proud of the RAF.

"Anyway, before the trip, we'd all been giving his lecture, about how Winston Churchill himself was gonna be on our ship! And how us RAF men were to leave him alone, apart from standing at attention and saluting. You know the bit. So, we did. And then, on the last night, the boys and I were feeling a bit daring…"

"And?"

"Well, this is what happened…"

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A/N - A very short first chapter, but it's a short story. Please review!


	2. Chapter 2

Change to Newkirk's POV

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CHAPTER TWO -

1940 -

We had just had supper, and were heading back to our quarters.

"This is it, our last night together." Sam said.

"It's exciting if you ask me." Bill said, grinning. "The three of us, taking to the skies! Those Nazis are never gonna know what hit them!"

"Yeah. It's too bad we can't celebrate or anything before we go our separate ways." Sam commented.

I was walking a bit behind the two of them. I wouldn't admit it, but I was a bit sad to be saying goodbye to them. They had been my best mates during training, and now we were all being sent to different airbases in England. I looked up and noticed something.

"Hey, gents!" I said, stepping between the two of them to stop them from going any further.

"What?" Bill asked.

I nodded to the door up and to our left. It was Winston Churchill's room. And the door was open.

"That's ole Winnie's room." I grinned, devilishly. "And the door's open."

"So?" Sam asked. I looked at Bill. He was smiling. He already knew where I was headed with this.

"Wait a tick… you can't be serious!" Sam exclaimed, having caught on. "You two actually want to break into the Prime Minister's room!"

"Shhh!" I said. "You don't have to announce it to the whole ruddy world! And besides, it's not breaking in if the door was open! Let's go!"

Bill and I went quickly over to the door. Sam paused, but didn't want to be left out, so followed along.

The room smelled of cigars, and was obviously the nicest room on the ship. Our room was half the size, and ten men were sharing it!

I spotted a couple of bottles of scotch on the table and waltzed over to them. Sam offered to watch the door, which was probably a good idea.

"Do you know what would happen to us if we got caught, Peter?" He hissed from the doorway.

"No, actually. No bleeding idea." I laughed. "Now I say we relax, and have a drink or two, compliments of Prime Minister Churchill."

I opened the bottle, and Bill found a couple shot's glasses. I poured the alcohol and we clinked our glasses together and downed the drinks. Then a second one.

"This is good stuff." I said, looking at the label on the bottle

"Only the best for the Prime Minister." Bill said in a very posh accent. We couldn't stop giggling at this, and I poured us a third shot.

"Sure you don't want some, Sammy?" I asked. He shook his head.

"I'll have his." Bill offered. That finished off the first bottle. I was about to start in on the second, when Sam turned to us in horror.

"He's coming! Hide!" I dropped the bottle on the carpeted floor, and ran behind the bookcase. Sam hid under the bed and Bill ran into the closet.

A second later, Churchill entered the room. He was muttering to himself about something. He checked his shelves and his suitcase, and then walked over to the desk, and checked there, for whatever it was he was looking for. He paused when he noticed the empty bottle, and the full bottle of scotch on the floor.

He picked up the full bottle, and placed in atop of the desk once more. He glanced around the room. I felt my heart pounding, I thought for sure he was going to see me. But, he didn't. Instead he just shook his head, and turned and headed out of the room.

I heard him saying to some one in the hall, "I apologize, General. I seem to have misplaced it." Then he was gone.

After a moment, I came out from behind the bookcase.

"He's gone now, mates." I said. My voice was shaky, and I didn't bother trying to hide it.

Next thing I knew, Bill was trying to keep Sam from beating me up.

"You bloody twat!" He cried. "I ought to -"

"Save your fighting spirit for the Krauts, Sam. Let's just get out of here before he comes back!" I suggested.

Sam nodded, and we all started for the door. But right before I reached the door, I stopped, and quickly went to the desk and grabbed the full bottle of scotch.

"Okay, let's go." I said, hiding the bottle in my coat.

Sam rolled his eyes and Bill just grinned. We practically sprinted back to our quarters to finish off our celebration.

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A/N - Please reply! I honestly love replies :) One Chapter to go.


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER THREE -

"I can't believe I'm hearing this." Hogan muttered, but he had a smile on his face.

"Mon Dieu!" LeBeau laughed. "You must be joking!"

"I can assure you, my friend, that really happened. I remember it like it was yesterday." Newkirk was beaming now.

"Well you're right about one thing. That was a pretty stupid thing to do! Albeit, impressive." Kinch said, dumbfounded by his friend's audacity.

"What can I say? You are in the presence of the master, gentlemen." Newkirk replied.

"You're a born trouble maker, Newkirk. But we're lucky to have someone as…knowledgeable as you. Knowledgeable? Is that the right word?" Hogan said.

"I think the word you're looking for is intrepid, Colonel." Newkirk said.

"I think the word he's looking for is reckless." Kinch said. Newkirk rolled his eyes.

"I still can't believe you STOLE from Winston Churchill!" Carter exclaimed.

"That'll be a story you can tell your grandkids one day." Hogan added.

"Sir!" Olsen came up from the tunnel as they were talking. "Message from the underground. Apparently there is some Field Marshal staying at a hotel in town. He's in disguise, and carrying some important papers. He's only going to be there another couple of days. They want some one to grab those papers for them while he's still there."

Immediately, all eyes were on Newkirk.

"Of course, of course." Peter said smoothly. He poured himself a bit more to drink. "You can count on me sir, I'll get it done. But you already knew that, didn't you?"

"If you want to get down off your high horse for a minute, we can talk about the mission." Hogan said.

"Sorry sir." Newkirk said. "I'm listening."

"That's better." They went over the plan, and at the end, Hogan gave one final warning.

"Now Newkirk, I don't want you stopping for a drink, or stealing any of the Field Marshall's scotch or anything like that. This is an important mission, I don't want you messing about. Understand?"

"I wouldn't dream of it, sir." Newkirk said.

The next evening, Newkirk returned from the mission.

"Here you are, sir." He said, handing the Field Marshall's documents to Colonel Hogan.

"Good. Well done. You didn't have any trouble?"

"Sir, look who you're talking to! Did I have any trouble, he asks!" Newkirk laughed.

"Alright, alright. And I'm assuming you followed orders, and didn't stop for any drinks?"

"For drinks, no." Newkirk said.

Hogan frowned.

"Excuse me?"

"Well remember last night when I said that I would've brought back some girls, only Klink didn't happen to have any?"

Hogan's eyes grew wide.

"I remember."

"Well, the good Field Marshall happened to be entertaining a fraulein, I figured…"

"Corporal, if you brought back a girl, so help me, I'll -" Hogan shouted, clearly outraged.

"I'm joking, I'm joking! Sir, I wouldn't really do a thing like that."

"I'm not so sure. I can never tell with you." Hogan said, glaring at the younger man, not really amused. "You really are a menace, Newkirk."

"Thank you, sir." The Englishman said smugly. "I appreciate that."

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A/N - This is a story based on ACTUAL EVENTS. Only instead of Newkirk, it's my Grandpa (Bill). And he was a sailor in the war, not a flyer. And Churchill never came back into the room when they were there. But the rest of it actually happened! :)


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